The Holiday - part 2: The End

I really have mixed feelings about the holidays, and pretty much always have. Well - not when I was 4 or 5 and prepping Santa his plate. I even added a carrot for the reindeer.
One.
Looking back on it it's funny how logic totally escapes you as a kid. Because only a couple of few weeks before that St Nicholas' donkey was entitled to a carrot of its own. No sharing involved. Unfairness if it ever was.
Then my parents divorced and I had to share my holiday time between them two. That meant twice the gifts (as my comrades at school kept telling me) but from the inside it was hard to see it that way. As a teenager I was only thinking of the time off it meant; as a young adult I had to spend hours trying to figure out a tight schedule where time would be equally divided between mom, dad and my boyfriend's family.
Oh boy.
Then I came to the US. And Christmas was never the same again.

But what has never changed is the mild depression that comes with January. The Holiday soufflé falls down, and we are left with a sense of...well...deflation. I know I am. I am always dreading NYE because of drunk drivers, overpriced parties and awkward kissing time at midnight but also because it signals the end of a time that, for sure, has lost most of its magic over time but is still one of the highlights of the year, whether one likes it or not. In France we have the redeeming celebration of the Epiphany (traditionally on the 6th - conveniently displaced to the first Sunday of the month to accommodate modern society) but after that and the succulent galette des rois, nothing. Nada. C'est fini. The Christmas tree comes down, the garlands go back in the basement, and checkbooks in drawers until the end of the month. Then starts the long strand of gray and cold, cold days. Spring seems further than ever. You just want to become Phil (the groundhog, not the doctor) and go to sleep until the first bud spotting. Shadow seeing or not.
January is just emptiness.
And this tremendous void doesn't make new resolutions any easier. Right?

But sometimes the beginning of the year can really and truly signals a true beginning.
Clean slate.
Let's write a new story.
It happened twice over these last three years, and I am determined to do it again. Because three times the charm.
This year is dedicated to my body. Beautify it, strengthen it, heal it....just take care of it. Because it's worth it. I am worth it!! ; )
Stay tuned...