5 years

February, 4th 2005:
I am in my closet, trying to figure out what to wear. Classic dilemma. But a delightful one. It's not too cold out for this time of year but I have no idea of what is in store for me today. It's a 'surprise'.
Hard decisions.
I settled on a warm skirt, boots and my long suede coat.

It's my first date with this guy. He's cute and I think we clicked. Very literally. He doesn't want anyone to know but we met on-line, through Yahoo. He liked the picture of me in the NYC subway, reading the city map, trying to figure out where to go next. I liked the dry humor of his profile, and his slight disenchantment. We chatted for three weeks. I am too shy to talk on the phone, let alone meet him. My poor English makes me nervous. And what if I make a fool of myself? what if I don't know what to say? or if I make a mistake? I want to impress.
I am anxious. Restless. Almost jittery.

We are to meet under the Bean in Millenium Park. No - the Cloud Gate. It's a first date; we need romance and not triviality. One my way back from work the night before I found out that the city has covered our landmark with a gigantic white tarp. I am not sure what to think about it....good sign? bad omen?
I have a sleepless night.

11:00 finally comes around. I walk the short distance to Millenium Park. Trying hard to keep my cool, steady my hands. Hoping to find my voice in an impossibly tight throat. I know he likes me. Things will be fine, I keep repeating myself.

February 4th, 2010:
The date went pretty well. Understatement: the date went really well. He was shy and charming, tall, so American-looking. I loved his dimples. His Chicago accent. His untamed hair.
He tried to impress me with French jazz records; the store was closed. Embarrassed moment. Cute. So he took me to the suburbs - a first for me after 17 months in Chicago - and we had a lovely time at the zoo....we hold hands watching dolphins. I learned one of my favorite English words, pacifier (there was one, all lonely and probably miserable, on the ground outside of the monkey exhibit. I pointed at it and asked for the word; I found it was adorable. I still do) . I made a mess eating sushi. We listened to Travis in the car. We didn't kiss.
I returned to my downtown studio, with butterflies in my stomach and stars in my eyes. I was humming Lou Reed's "Perfect Day".

A lot happened during these last 5 years. Of course. 5 years is a pretty long time, something like... 1825 days? And nights. We laughed, fought, cried, traveled, talked - a lot. We moved a few times. Bought a place. Thought about losing it. Worked and complained about it. Read. Watched. Loved. Adopted a kitten. Then a dog. And another cat. I learned that he cannot touch suede; it makes him cringe. He made me like beer, the Doves and silly TV shows. I initiated him to wine, all things French, expensive meals and ever-changing hairstyles. We shared, experimented, lived our lives, and wondered endless times on how to live them to the fullest. We got frustrated many times, and shared incredible moments of happiness that made all worth it.
Today - here we are. Hopeful for the future, and ready to make this year count in more than one way. We have weaknesses, but mostly we are strong - and ready for the challenge.

Last night we celebrated with an intimate dinner. No fancy restaurant, no frills but a fusion place that sums us to perfection. Simple yet refined, we just enjoyed the moment and each other's company. Knowing that there will be many other anniversaries to come.
Life gave us to one another and we cannot ask for much more. But we will. Because it's the way we are wired, for better or for worse.
And we like it.